MISCELLANEOUS POEMS.
OCCASIONAL EPILOGUE.
SPOKEN BY MR. COBBY, IN THE CHARACTER OF VAPID, AFTER THE PLAY OF THE
DRAMATIST, AT THE KILKENNY THEATRE.
(_Entering as if to announce the Play_.)
Ladies and Gentlemen, on Monday night,
For the ninth time--oh accents of delight
To the poor author's ear, when _three times three_
With a full bumper crowns, his Comedy!
When, long by money, and the muse, forsaken,
He finds at length his jokes and boxes taken,
And sees his play-bill circulate--alas,
The only bill on which his name will pass!
Thus, Vapid, thus shall Thespian scrolls of fame
Thro' box and gallery waft your well-known name,
While critic eyes the happy cast shall con,
And learned ladies spell your _Dram. Person_.
'Tis said our worthy Manager[1]intends
To help my night, and _he_, ye know, has friends.
Friends, did I say? for fixing friends, or _parts_,
Engaging actors, or engaging hearts,
There's nothing like him! wits, at his request.
Are turned to fools, and dull dogs learn to jest;
Soldiers, for him, good "trembling cowards" make,
And beaus, turned clowns, look ugly for his sake;
For him even lawyers talk without a fee,
For him (oh friendship) _I_ act tragedy!
In short, like Orpheus, his persuasive tricks
Make _boars_ amusing, and put life in _sticks_.
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