Had you but seen her look when first
From my mad lips the avowal burst;
Not angered--no!--the feeling came
From depths beyond mere anger's flame--
It was a _sorrow_ calm as deep,
A mournfulness that could not weep,
So filled her heart was to the brink,
So fixt and frozen with grief to think
That angel natures--that even I
Whose love she clung to, as the tie
Between her spirit and the sky--
Should fall thus headlong from the height
Of all that heaven hath pure and bright!
That very night--my heart had grown
Impatient of its inward burning;
The term, too, of my stay was flown,
And the bright Watchers near the throne.
Already, if a meteor shone
Between them and this nether zone,
Thought 'twas their herald's wing returning.
Oft did the potent spell-word, given
To Envoys hither from the skies,
To be pronounced when back to heaven
It is their time or wish to rise,
Come to my lips that fatal day;
And once too was so nearly spoken,
That my spread plumage in the ray
And breeze of heaven began to play;--
When my heart failed--the spell was broken--
The word unfinisht died away,
And my checkt plumes ready to soar,
Fell slack and lifeless as before.
How could I leave a world which she,
Or lost or won, made all to me?
No matter where my wanderings were,
So there she lookt, breathed, moved about--
Woe, ruin, death, more sweet with her,
Than Paradise itself, without!
But to return--that very day
A feast was held, where, full of mirth,
Came--crowding thick as flowers that play
In summer winds--the young and gay
And beautiful of this bright earth.
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