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Moore, Thomas, 1779-1852

"The Complete Poems of Sir Thomas Moore Collected by Himself with Explanatory Notes"



Say, who was the wag, indecorously witty,
Who first in a statute this libel conveyed;
And thus slyly referred to the selfsame committee,
As matters congenial, Religion and Trade?
Oh surely, my Phillpotts, 'twas thou didst the deed;
For none but thyself or some pluralist brother,
Accustomed to mix up the craft with the creed,
Could bring such a pair thus to twin with each other.
And yet, when one thinks of times present and gone,
One is forced to confess on maturer reflection
That 'tisn't in the eyes of committees alone
That the shrine and the shop seem to have some connection.
Not to mention those monarchs of Asia's fair land,
Whose civil list all is in "god-money" paid;
And where the whole people, by royal command,
Buy their gods at the government mart, ready made;[1]--
There was also (as mentioned, in rhyme and in prose, is)
Gold heaped throughout Egypt on every shrine,
To make rings for right reverend crocodiles' noses--
Just such as, my Phillpotts, would look well in thine.
But one needn't fly off in this erudite mood;
And 'tis clear without going to regions so sunny
That priests love to do the _least_ possible good
For the largest _most_ possible quantum of money.
"Of him," saith the text, "unto whom much is given,
"Of him much, in turn, will be also required:"--
"By _me_," quoth the sleek and obese man of heaven--
"Give as much as you will--more will still be desired.


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