Were such an accusation cast unjustly upon you, you
would throw it off impatiently, and stand up for yourself and your
innocence in the broad light of day. Even were you debarred, as he was,
from speaking out the whole truth, you would never be cast down to that
desponding depth, and thereby give a colouring to the doubt cast upon
you. Are you thinking this? But you must remember that it was not for
_himself_ that Arthur was so weighed down. Had he possessed no
conception as to how the note went, he would have met the charge very
differently, bearing himself bravely, and flinging their suspicion to
the winds. "You people cannot think _me_ guilty," he might have said;
"my whole previous life is a refutation to the charge." He would have
held up his head and heart cheerfully; waiting, and looking for the
time when elucidation should come.
No; his grief, his despondency were felt for Hamish. If Arthur Channing
had cherished faith in one living being more than in another, it was in
his elder brother. He loved him with a lasting love, he revered him as
few revere a brother; and the shock was great. He would far rather have
fallen down to guilt himself, than that Hamish should have fallen. Tom
Channing had said, with reference to Arthur, that, if he were guilty,
he should never believe in anything again; they might tell him that the
cathedral was a myth, and not a cathedral, and he should not be
surprised.
Pages:
280
281
282
283
284
285
286
287
288
289
290
291
292
293
294
295
296
297
298
299
300
301
302
303
304