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Surtees, Robert Smith, 1803-1864

"Mr. Sponge's Sporting Tour"

See a Frenchman--how light
and buoyant he trips into a drawing-room, fresh from the satisfactory
scrutiny of the looking-glass, with all the news, and jokes, and
tittle-tattle of the day, in full bloom! How sparkling and radiant he is,
with something smart and pleasant to say to every one! How thoroughly happy
and easy he is; and what a contrast to phlegmatic John Bull, who stands
with his great red fists doubled, looking as if he thought whoever spoke to
him would be wanting him to endorse a bill of exchange! But, as we said
before, the dread hour before dinner is an awful time in the
country--frightful when there are two hours, and never a subject in common
for the company to work upon. Laverick Wells and their mutual acquaintance
was all Sponge and Jawleyford's stock-in-trade; and that was a very small
capital to begin upon, for they had been there together too short a time to
make much of a purse of conversation. Even the young ladies, with their
inquiries after the respective flirtations--how Miss Sawney and Captain
Snubnose were 'getting on'? and whether the rich Widow Spankley was likely
to bring Sir Thomas Greedey to book?--failed to make up a conversation; for
Sponge knew little of the ins and outs of these matters, his attention
having been more directed to Mr.


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