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Surtees, Robert Smith, 1803-1864

"Mr. Sponge's Sporting Tour"


Our worthy friend sat on his horse a few seconds staring intently into the
dining-room window, thinking that lapse of time might cause the
fourpenny-piece to be sufficiently respected to procure him something like
directions how to proceed as well to get rid of his horse, as to procure
access to the house, the door of which stood frowningly shut. In this,
however, he was mistaken, for no sooner had the woman uttered the words,
'Well, you can come in and see,' than she flaunted into the interior of the
room, and commenced a regular series of assaults upon the furniture,
throwing the hearth-rug over one chair back, depositing the fire-irons in
another, rearing the steel fender up against the Carrara marble
chimney-piece, and knocking things about in the independent way that
servants treat unoffending furniture, when master and mistress are
comfortably esconced in bed. 'Flop' went the duster again; 'bang' went the
furniture; 'knock' this chair went against that, and she seemed bent upon
putting all things into that happy state of sixes and sevens that
characterizes a sale of household furniture, when chairs mount tables, and
the whole system of domestic economy is revolutionized.


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