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Surtees, Robert Smith, 1803-1864

"Mr. Sponge's Sporting Tour"


Just then, in came Lady Scattercash, attended by Mr. Orlando Bugles, the
ladies' attractions having caused that distinguished performer to forfeit
his engagement at the Surrey Theatre. Captain Cutitfat, Bob Spangles, and
Sir Harry quickly followed, and the Sponge question was presently renewed.
'Who says old brown boots comes?' exclaimed Seedeybuck from the sofa.
'Who's that with his nasty nob on my fine satin sofa?' asked the lady.
'Bob Spangles,' replied Seedeybuck.
'Nothing of the sort,' rejoined the lady; 'and I'll trouble you to get
off.'
'Can't--I've got a bone in my leg,' rejoined the captain.
'I'll soon make you,' replied her ladyship, seizing the squab, and pulling
it on to the floor.
As the captain was scrambling up, in came Peter--one of the wageless
footmen--with candles, which having distributed equitably about the room,
he approached Lady Scattercash, and asked, in an independent sort of way,
what room Mr. Soapsuds was to have.
'Soapsuds!--Soapsuds!--that's not his name,' exclaimed her ladyship.


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