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Sheckley, Robert, 1928-2005

"Bad Medicine"

" The Regenerator was silent for several minutes.
Then, hesitantly, it said, "This is beyond doubt a most unusual case."
"Really?" Caswell asked, pleased.
"Yes. The coefficients seem--I'm not sure...." The machine's robotic voice grew
feeble. The pilot light began to flicker and fade.
"Hey, what's the matter?"
"Confusion," said the machine. "Of course," it went on in a stronger
voice, "the unusual nature of the symptoms need not prove entirely
baffling to a competent therapeutic machine. A symptom, no matter how
bizarre, is no more than a signpost, an indication of inner difficulty.
And all symptoms can be related to the broad mainstream of proven
theory. Since the theory is effective, the symptoms must relate. We
will proceed on that assumption."
"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" asked Caswell, feeling
lightheaded.
The machine snapped back, its pilot light blazing. "Mechanotherapy
today is an exact science and admits no significant errors. We will
proceed with a word-association test."
"Fire away," said Caswell.
"House?"
"Home."
"Dog?"
"Cat."
"Fleefl?"
Caswell hesitated, trying to figure out the word. It sounded vaguely
Martian, but it might be Venusian or even--
"Fleefl?" the Regenerator repeated.


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